For this new decade of 2K10, I considered making a Bucket List. You know...where you write down all the things you'd still like to do before you kick the bucket, aka die. Then I read about an upended version of the Bucket List...the shuck it, chuck it, F#*k It List. Ironically, your F#*k It List is pretty much the same as the Bucket List. Only difference is that you give yourself permission to forget about doing a lot of the stuff on your Bucket list. Simply put: don't do it...screw it and set yourself free.
For me personally, a F#*k It List removes all the pressure to sky dive out of an airplane just to prove I am fearless; to climb Macchu Picchu, to run a marathon or to finish the book I've been struggling to write for the last 10 years. At this stage of my life, I accept the fact that I am not fearless. I am afraid of things but I have learned to overcome my fears and move forward. I am a strong person. I've battled cancer, other serious ongoing health issues and devastating personal situations with humor, determination and optimism. I am a thriver, not just a survivor. I may never write the great American novel but apparently after 10 years, I really don't want to finish my book. The only reason I'd like to run a marathon is because many of my friends have done it. Since I'm extremely competitive, I think "Why shouldn't I run one too?" But then why subject myself to pain and possible injury when I don't have to? Duh. No pain, no gain. Forget that. Life should be pain free and enjoyable. Walking, talking, laughing, hoisting a glass of wine and soaking up a gorgeous sunset not gasping for breath as you stumble along a city street, in the cold and rain, dodging traffic and feeling like your legs are about to be ripped off your body. No thank you. But that's just me.
Truthfully, I'd still like to visit Macchu Picchu because I love to travel. But if I don't get there, I'm not going to beat myself up about it. That's the beauty of the F#*k It list. You can give yourself permission to chuck all of your previous aspirations or only some of them...with no regrets. Make no mistake. It's not about turning into a couch potato. It's not about giving up. It's not about punishing yourself by setting unrealistic feats of endurance. I still have goals and dreams. But I've come to realize that in reality, I've actually achieved much of what I was hoping to accomplish. I don't need to jump out of an airplane to determine if I'm a risk-taker. I already know I have taken huge risks over my lifetime...business risks, personal risks, emotional and physical risks. Most of them worked out just fine.
We all share a desire to be happy, healthy and comfortable and have people in our lives who are kind and give us support when we need it. Of course, we must reciprocate. And that's what it's all about. So for me, I am relinquishing some old expectations and embracing new opportunities. I'm focusing my energy and attention on people I love and respect. I may not go sky-diving because I truly don't want to do such insanity. But I can walk along the Great Wall of China. I can reconnect with long lost friends and explore Alaska. By this time, most of us know who we can count on and who we can't. It's OK to shuck the schmucks in your life. They only make you miserable.
Once you write down your chuck it, shuck it, F#*k It list, you will feel liberated and alive. If you still want to jump out of an airplane, go for it. You might want to wear a parachute. But if you don't like having your brains sucked out of your head as you're yanked into the wild blue yonder, let it go. Move on and relish other opportunities and possiblities out there for you. Do what you value most. Release issues you cannot control. Be flexible and open to change. Embrace spontaneity. Humor goes a long way. As the inimitable comedian, George Carlin used to say: "Enjoy the ride. There's no return ticket."
Sphere: Related Content
Recent Posts
15 comments:
Ooh, I like this! Makes a lot of sense. I've never thought of it quite this way before. I am looking at some relationships and trying to decide if they are positive or negative. No need to be around negative stuff if you don't have to.
Just this week, we were talking about letting go of the negativity in our lives.
I like your spin on the bucket list and there are definitley things that I won't get done on mine, so I now refuse to worry about them.
Now that I'm older and wise I gave up worrying. I like your take on life though, and I adore your header picture. Thanks for visiting my blog and leaving a comment. Happy writing!
Kathy R. said: I agree with acceptance and living each day as fully as possible.
haha - I LOVE your writing - you crack me up. I look forward to receiving your latest and greatest Boomer Pie every week. It certainly was a different spin on the good ol bucket list. I have parachuting on my list.
Well I'm going to Machu Pichu this summer and I'm going to swm in a bioluminescent bay in february. Check 2 off. But as far as adrenalin goes--I'm overthat. I'm sure I'll reach a point where I'll say f**k it but not yet.
Awesome post. I love your advice to "shuck the shmucks" and the f**k it list. Thanks BP.
Robyn
Yep I love that concept...being an ideas person I am just that...in love with things at the idea stage!!! I think a lot of us feel a degree of guilt about what a glitzy media type interpretation of 'living life to the full' is and how we don't often achieve it!!!
Cherishing the small things, acts of love and kindness, learning, thinking, pondering, laughing, smiling even...that fills me up!
Thanks for stopping by my blog. I've enjoyed reading yours just now. If you are truly considering LapBand I'd be happy to answer any questions you have.
Thanks for dropping by Blog From The North. I've enjoyed your blog too.
What if the only thing on my Bucket List is to write a Bucket List? I keep saying I'll get around to it, but...
Lol. Great post. Love the new take. Never thought of the fact of how something we make to make us feel good would make us feel bad!
All I can say is down with the 'bucket list', 2KX is the year for the 'chuck it, shmuck it, f#&k it list'! :-)
Leah, you just gave me an idea for a post about things that are supposed to make us feel good...but don't. Off hand, I can't think of anything...except maybe health care. But I know there's gotta be a ton of material.Any ideas, anybody?
Interesting concept. I never considered it, although for years I have had a "Things I never want to do" list and there is only one item, No.1.
One of your ambitions is really worthwhile, however you don't "climb" Machu Picchu, you go up by bus and walk across the carpark. It's a misconception that a lot of people have. Machu Picchu is not a mountain, it is not high, in fact it is just a hill in the jungle at 1,700m asl. Nearby Winya Wayna, is more of a mountain, it overlooks MP and is a stealthy climb that affords a great view of MP. I was a tourguide there in 1997/8, you can read about it here: http://pausedinperu.blogspot.com/
Have fun, whichever list you follow.
AV
A.V. Thanks for sharing your up close and personal advice about Macchu Picchu. Gives me more incentive to go there now.
Post a Comment